Of Vanity and Extravagant

There's a few perks you get when you're pregnant in 2nd trimester. Of course those who are lucky, get to experience sudden growth of healthy hair, glowing insensitive acne free skin all over. None whatsoever complications, very slight aches. And some got to experience overflowing of happiness most of the time. I am that stage right this moment.

Well, sort of. Not most of the time I'm happy. Some of the time I got headache seeing a really really beautiful baby cot (see picture) that's going to cost me a whopping £849. I just chucked that idea of buying that cot away in the bin. After all it'll only be used for 2 years maximum and there are a lot of other baby cots that cost a fraction of the price which is also a good quality.

My god you're beautiful. But man you're expensive. Think I could make one myself?

My husband and I, like most start up average family out there are no where near buying that ridiculously expensive cot. We're a start up. In a phase where the income for our family is just a graduate income. And when we've added up all the national insurance tax, income tax, value added tax, council tax, car insurance, road tax and so on all that is left is a fraction of that income with a little to spend and a little to save. To think about it we really work to pay tax.

But I consider myself and my husband really really lucky. We still managed to live comfortably at the moment. Of course I was even more comfortable before. Even to an extend luxurious to some people. But having said that I was living under daddy's premium credit card, money and daddy's safety net. I took everything for granted.

Then seeing my husband works his butt off just to pay rent and utilities is already a struggled and yet he never complains and so is daddy. So to still be under daddy's safety net and took everything for granted just seem wrong and inconsiderate and selfish.

Proudly, I decided that it is best I give a nice slap on myself and support the family and changed my habits and lifestyle. I've stop doing unnecessary shopping which would only result in guilty and short term satisfaction. I'll stop wanting to buy extravagant stuffs just to satisfy my lust and make myself feel good. Altogether I've stop making shopping as a form of stress release mechanism.

Because not just it's good for oneself but Islam also never teaches us to be in vanity. Islam never encourages us to be extravagant.
And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “and waste not by extravagance. Verily, He likes not Al‑Musrifoon (those who waste by extravagance)” - Quran 
"Give the kinsman his due, and the needy, and the wayfarer, and squander not (your wealth) in wantonness. Lo! the squanderers were ever brothers of the devils, and the devil was ever an ingrate to his Lord" - Quran 
Amr ibn Shuaib, on his father's authority said that his grandfather related that the Prophet said: When you eat, drink, give charity and wear clothes, let no extravagance or pride be mixed up with what you do. (Ibn Maja, Nasai).
To waste is to be brother to the devil??!! I don't want that. God no. (further reading here)

Because you know what, I have found tremendous amount of other stuffs to do to release my stress. And I realised that temporary things aren't as important as my goal in life and my family. And I realised it is better for me to be in control of myself rather than the environment takes control over me. Trapped in the rat race that never really bring us to our final destination and satisfaction. I realised I should be grateful when millions of other would trade anything to be in my position right now.

I realised to be able to delay gratification is truly liberating.

Ghee! Daddy must be proud.


honeyumaira said...

happpy for you....:) you are more wiser when you grow older..heheh..

Yunne Osman said...

assalam hana.

it's good you realized that buying an expensive cot would do no good especially when you can get a cheaper one with an equal quality. i've learnt my lesson the hard way. i ended up with more than one cot for my first born and finally selling them back when they are no longer in use (thank God for those fb buyers). and i personally think a playpen is of much use compared to a cot. it can be folded and is easy to bring along with you anywhere plus, it could prevent my super active boy from bumping his head on cot railings since playpen are usually made from net and fabric as opposed to wood of normal cot. but a cot is great for babies up to 8 months. once they start to crawl and such, i think a playpen is of better use. one thing for sure, invest in a good pram/stroller/buggy. get one that can be folded into the smallest bit and can be used until a child is 3 or 4 years old. stokke, quinny and maclaren are worth a try.

Keirfan said...

Hana it's ok to buy expensive crib/ cot if you buy the convertible one. My son is almost 4, he's still using the crib that I bought him before he was born. It's convertible, so now it's a toddler bed instead of a crib.

Keirfan said...

yet again don't buy a ridiculously expensive one la heheh 

hanafedora said...

Don't think I can buy the convertible one. Our house can hold more stuffs at the moment. And of course... reasonably expensive is okay if you're gonna use it for years to come

hanafedora said...

Hey hey thanks yunne for the tips! I'm thinking about play pen :)